Hey, how often does a new t-shirt come out that includes Shakespeare and The Ladies? Ahh, to be young again…

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I feel a little dirty even linking to the Bulwer-Lytton Contest results, but some of the entries are too horrible to pass up. You’ll have to go there yourself to see the winner, but here are a few selected runners-up and dishonorable mentions:
From the science fiction category:
Racing through space at unimaginable speeds, Capt. Dimwell [...]

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You can count on me to bring you the hard news…

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Because you just can’t get enough of the Goog with fingers alone, now your ass can participate too!

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A blog post put me on the trail of lists of rejected children’s book titles, from which I culled a few favorites:

Juggling Knives is Easy
You Can Get Sucked Down the Drain
Your First Day at School and Why You’ll Never Come Home Again
You Can Make a Plastic Bag Space Helmet
Fun Experiments with Fire
Little Hands, Big Toasters
Harry [...]

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Man writes bland article about Paul McCartney for the New Yorker. Blogger comments on article’s blandness. Much unintended hilarity ensues. The funny lesson here is that the “writer” who is upset comes off looking so poorly prepared for his job, while the “blogger who is not a writer by virtue of being a blogger” is [...]

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Patricia Storms’ Art Imitating Lit cartoons are amusing. The irony of needing to be in-touch with the contretemps of the literary in-crowd to understand Storms’ dissing of the same is not lost on me…

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Robert Pinsky moderates a linguistic duel, the Meta-Free-Phor-All between Stephen Colbert and Sean Penn.

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According to the site, Kermit the Frog quickly spiraled out of control after Jim Henson’s death, into a life of sex, drugs, and alcohol. Sad Kermit.
Hear Sad Kermit sing Creep by Radiohead, watch the video of his cover of NIN’s Hurt, and more.

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From my old friend Kirk’s blog– monkey madness:

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Making fun of Fergie’s “music” is like shooting fish in a barrel, but still…

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A new addition to my “someday when the kids have moved out, become established, and I actually have a few dollars to spend on something I want” wishlist. Maybe in the golf shirt style so I could wear it at conferences…

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Henry LizardLover not only poses iguanas for rather interesting photos, he also provides information on how to care for and feed them, the right tools for clipping their nails, and ways to avoid killing them by accident.

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Here’s Jonathan Ross’ poem, one of just a few runners-up in a limerick contest to “elucide the scientific study The Relationship of Illumination to the Color and Acceptability of Fermented Sausage:

Some salamis exposed to a spectrum
Of light make us want to reject ‘em
For their discolored look
Makes them often mistook
For the product of somebody’s rectum

To read [...]

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You have to love YouTube. Some of these “cover songs” made me laugh until I cried (and my ears bled).
First, there’s the commercially stupid, like this Kids inc. cover of Is This Love or a young Fergie singing Lionel Richie to a terrifying, broom spinning clown.
Then you’ve got the terrible, beginner (we hope) bands. [...]

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John Hodgman’s book The Areas of My Expertise is, for my money, one of the funniest books I’ve ever read. Go buy it. Now, courtesy of Wet Asphalt (really I’m ripping their entire post sans a cool extra tidbit you’ll have to surf over there to see), comes more good Hodgman stuff… namely his new [...]

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They were and weren’t laughing matters:
Communism is the only political system to have created its own international brand of comedy. The standard interpretation is that communist jokes were a form of resistance. But they were also a safety valve for the regimes and jokes were told by the rulers as well as the ruled—even Stalin [...]

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Presenting Ernest and Bertram. As seen at Sundance and banned by the good folks at the Creative Television workshop. Love the soundtrack…

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What’s next for William H. Macy? Besides bleeding…
William H. Macy interviewed on a new show from The Simpsons…

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Epistemology renders dieting moot. If nothing exists except in my mind, not only can I order anything; the service will be impeccable.
Read the rest of Woody Allen’s “Thus Ate Zarathustra”

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